Mansplaining to men … in a way that even the dumbest tone-deaf guys can relate to.

Image credits: Julius Ghost

Man Perfectly Explains Women’s Rage Today Using Brutal Analogy So That All Men Can Finally Understand It

There is no way of talking around or explaining away the analogy in a way that will make he or she who attempts it look really really ignorantly bad.


Moxon said that his analogy – like any other – is imperfect, and he has received a lot of feedback since he hit “sent.” Positive and negative. “I chose nut-kicking because there isn’t a man alive that doesn’t understand exactly what a nut-shot is, and, with very few exceptions, none who would ever want it or seek it out or go out ‘asking’ for it,” he explained. “Most importantly, no man confuses getting kicked in the nuts with sex. It’s very clearly violence, even though it involves sex organs. The idea of growing up in a society where getting hoofed in the balls is normalized behavior, systematically if tacitly allowed by a complicit society, and frequently confused with a pleasurable activity like sex, would rightfully be horrifying to any guy.”

The Bored  Panda article’s author  posted the entirety of of A. R. Moxon’s tweets. I have combined that part of the article into a sequential quotation of what Moxon wrote


Hi, guys. Imagine if one day you got kicked in the nuts, really hard, on purpose. You doubled over. Felt the pain. Nearly passed out. Then you got kicked again. And Again.

Imagine it happened to you when you were 12. Imagine it was a 38-year0-old woman who did it.  Imagine it was your mother’s friend and business partner.

Imagine that later your father explained that women just wanted to kick men in the nuts, so as a boy you had to be careful.

Imagine he had very detailed practical advice on this.

Imagine you started spending your life planning on avoiding being kicked in the nuts.

Imagine you became aware that women, including much older women – even elderly women – were always looking at your nuts. Women on the street would follow you. They’d tell you what a nice package you have. They tell you you’d be hot if you just showed off your nuts a little more.

Imagine you started wearing clothes to hide them. You bough uncomfortable protective gear.

All the posters and advertisements in all the magazines featured men’s crotches, though frequently not their heads. Women’s feet were frequently featured in prominent juxtapositions.

Imagine most of your friends all told you about getting kicked in the nuts. Imagine none of them had told anybody else.

Imagine all the older girls at school would make jokes about kicking you in the nuts. Imagine all the laughter. The jokes are all so funny.

Imagine you went to church and were told that God made girls to want your body, so you should protect your nuts at all costs. Imagine a  minister said it was your responsibility as a maturing boy not to do anything that would make girls think about kicking you in the nuts.

Imagine you found a girlfriend and you loved each other. One night you were fooling around and she kicked you as hard as she could in the nuts, and it all came rushing back.

Imagine she acted like obviously you wanted to be kicked in the nuts, mocked you for getting emotional.

Imagine you told the police, and they asked you what you had been wearing before she kicked you in the nuts. Asked if you’d had a drink. Asked what you might have been doing before. Had you been naked? Kissing?

Imagine there were laws that said that if a wife kicked her husband in the nuts it wasn’t assault.

Imagine you heard about men with ruptured testicles who had to pay for their own forensic reports. Imagine you saw statistics showing only 1% of kickings resulted in confiction.

Imagine a girl was caught kicking a boy repeatedly in the nuts while he was passed out drunk.

Imagine the judge let her off, because she was worried about the damage to the girl’s future prospects. She was a star swimmer with a scholarship.

Imagine this happened all the time.

Imagine one day if men all started talking about how most all of them had, at one point or another, been kicked in the nuts.

Imagine if women’s main concern was what a false accusation might do to their reputations, and whether this new honesty might ruin the mystery of sex.

Imagine a woman ran for president.

Imagine audio came out of her bragging about making it a regular practice to kick men in the nuts without even introducing herself. Imagine she lost no support for this.

Imagine she claimed the men accusing her were lying. Imagine she said they were too ugly to kick. Image there had never been a male president. Imagine she ran against the first major-party male candidate. Imagine he had experience, and she had none. Imagine she won anyway.

Imagine she supported a Senate candidate known for kicking young boys in the testicles.

Imagine she nominated a judge.

Imagine the judge was accused of kicking the boy in the nuts. Imagine the accuser had to hide from all the death threats as a result.

Imagine the woman president mocked the accuser in front of a crowd, and the crowd laughed and clapped. Imagine the judge was confirmed. Imagine the deciding vote was a man. Can you imagine?

Now imagine that being kicked in the nuts might result in you having to create, in your body, a genetic replication of the person who kicked you. And imagine the judge intended to make sure you have to carry it. Imagine that was the “reason” she was chosen [nominated and approved.]

I can’t imagine women’s rage today, but this exercise, while abstract, helped me to get nearer to it than I’d been.

Be kind to women guys. Today and every day.

If you see somebody being cruel to women, or abusive, or violent?

Kick em in the nuts.

By the way it’s 100% insane that this issue seems to require an analogy to draw a sharper focus on how wrong our society presently is, but here we are.

For those who worry and dare not speak out because the consequences might be too unpleasant.

Me Too So what

Thread by @DavidNeiwert: 

“There’s been a lot of hand wringing in the media pundit corps and centrist politicians these days about the loss of comity, post-Kavanaugh. And then Donald Trump made them all look absurd with his remarks at his rally last night.”

Comity” is a big word I know, especially for folks who don’t read much but copy and paste lots. For them folks then comity= courtesy and considerate behavior toward others.

” So when we talk about the lack of civility in our common discourse, it’s important first to understand that that particular horse fled the burning barn many many moons ago. And again, it was not the left that lit the match.” – Neiwert .

let your powder dry out and form up with the rest of us.


We’re past the nomination and voting. From this point on the real revolutionary war begins. This is not the time to be stumbling out of the gate.

The buck stops … where?

Is the Democratic Party willing to disavow any right to ownership of a nation’s agenda and concede that right with disingenuous cowardice to a corrupt Republican president and party?

Are we going to let party puppeteers with it’s incumbent House and Senate marionettes who are on someone else’s payroll besides the people tread on us?

Do we want to concede the right to a worthwhile agenda to Republican politicians and stampeding broadcasters who toss out nothing but nonsense?

The moral high ground is ours to take, not the property of MAGA supporters who demonstrate the will power of sheep. The moral high ground of the electorate – all of us and not the parties – is where the buck really stops.

So how is it that Mr. Trump, Mr. McConnell, Mr. Graham and Mr. Kavanaugh are cheerleading themselves like high school drunks who got away with something?

Such is their means of avoidance of discussing that which supposedly divides us. They are never going to publicly discuss their behavior so long as they can hide behind the self-serving rhetoric we heard during the SCOTUS hearings.

Come on … I wasn’t happy pushing what many considered divisive discussion. But it was never so uncomfortable as to suggest that hurting a rabid dog’s feelings was justification for remaining silent.

Mr. Trump and his party long ago forfeited the moral high ground They have tossed it carelessly into the filth. That’s where they have put it and apparently where they intend to keep it.

In reality the moral high ground is not something forfeited or tossed around like a hot potato between rival parties. It always resides with the actual electorate …  well, at least to the non-apathetic minority of the electorate. I assume that’s all of us here and elsewhere who are willing to stay involved.

You may have always insisted that you prefer to stay away from political discourse. What a nonsensical idea! Your leaders aren’t doing that. Your employers aren’t doing that. Your clergy is not doing that? Most of those whose decisions have some impact on your own life are not staying away from politics. Why would you – unless your personal totem is the ostrich?


Mr. Trump and his Republican-dominated leadership are in crises in practically every state in the union. Their public utterances only make things worse image-wise.

What better way to dilute negative attention to your party’s weaknesses and flaws than to foolishly pronounce shallow slogans that  in no way promote positive restorative solutions. Any useable solution – by the way – requires  courage beyond national jingoism.

We know who has the wherewithal to clean up their act from the politically foul fungus staining our American Dream.

Not the elected Republicans,
not the Republican evangelicals,
none of the pandering Republican opportunists
and certainly not the discredited president.

The images of self-congratulatory males taking credit for cover-up of crimes look to me like a coronation picture for a SCOTUS justice and a loud-mouthed tweeter.

McConnell gloats

Now all of you who are still horrified, let your powder dry out and form up with the rest of us. Time is wasting and there is never a poor time to fire shots heard round the country.

This will be a struggle of more than words and concepts. The fight is in each of our communities. As citizens, our weapon is publicity in all its forms: blogs, LTE’s, public speaking, meetings and private conversations.

Apologetics is not going to get the job done. The less we have to apologize for the better off we’ll be. Besides, apologetics should not really  be in our arsenal. Focusing on Republican governance is not something for which Democrats need apologize.

Don’t let’s start this thing out with the  whimper that “We didn’t start the fire.” Some  Democrats helped light that damn fire. If you prefer to stay with the rear -guard around the camp fires and preen your political savvy in endless parades of tacky – I mean tactical political logic – be my guest. Stay in the rear guard. Keep your heads down so you don’t get hurt. Don’t try to be cute about this. Nothing uglier than a pundit in leotards trying to strap on a six-gun for a duel in the street.

As pundits unwilling to be combatants, don’t create meaningless distractions and plots. Don’t try to sell snake oil while bodies are colliding. (You might get hit by heavyweights flying off the top ropes.)

Another thing, let us stand by American women in all venues. I challenge you to be one with those refusing to cut and run from the real revolution. We have seen the enemy and they are not us.

And to quote Elizabeth Warren who may or may not run herself,

““I watched eleven men too chicken to question a woman themselves. I watched powerful men helping another powerful man. . . . I thought, Time’s up. It’s time for women to go to Washington and fix a broken government, and that includes a woman at the top.”



It’s time to step out of the shallow end of the religion pool

contra patriarchy

On mental constructs: 

Old Wrathful and The Goddess

Both images created by Michelangelo

Old Wrathful pictured above typifies the predominant religious mental construct of the masculine god of patriarchal order.

The Pieta on the right suggests to me a more accurate and beautiful rendition of the Divine.

That which gives right-wing social conservatives the fuel for self-righteous anger is an unconscious assumption that they are only expressing the same judgemental feelings of the unseen punitive Jehovah … “You and me, ain’t that right Lord?”

That Old Wrathful is the God they see, reverence and obey in their hearts is obvious.

Most living things are – in one form or another – birthed by a female. In the case of human beings, males do not conceive a child, do not carry unborns within their bodies and do not birth human beings.

The big fat divine male patriarch can only do one thing – no matter that he talks about it all the time and elevates his contribution to a point of silliness. All he can do is contribute his seed.

The female does the rest.

So I ask you honestly, who owns creation?

If you were all gaga about your invisible friend who can’t tolerate sin with any degree of allowance and who is obsessed with human sexuality, i.e. “seed dispensing,” how gaga or shamed would you be if you knew that all your theological prancing around was being observed invisibly by the female portrayed in the sculpture and who had to have birthed the Old Wrathful Male?

How would you act and speak if you knew that Heavenly Mother – the real thing and not the wife of Jehovah – was watching you and listening to you?

Let me continue by asking that you describe to yourself (and for your own understanding) the spiritual image that comes to mind when you think of God, of Jesus, of the Holy Ghost and – but not least – Mother in Heaven.

Is your image of God the Father defined by the doctrine and theology of your particular religion?

Is your image of Jesus that defined by fundamental Christian theology?

If you pray to Jesus Christ, do you pray to the standard Christian theological definition of the Savior of the World, the Redeemer, the He-Who-Accomplished-the-Atonement?

And how – if you carry such an image – do you perceive Heavenly Mother; the Goddess?

Many ancient pagan religions encouraged prayer to statues. Christianity has a tradition of bowing and praying to statuary images of Jesus, Mary and the Saints. Wouldn’t it be interesting to discover whether we are offering prayers to internally-imagined anthropomorphic divine images, or merely offer mental oblations to the cosmos

… or might we reverence our selves and The Divine in a manner entirely different?

If you had achieved a genuine and spiritually sensed relationship with the higher power how would you respond to the following portrayals if they did not fit what you already possessed in your experience?

There is the old idea of God as a masculine Boss of the Universe no matter how respectfully and reverentially that notion is expressed.

There is the old idea that God is a kindly, and benevolently divine version of a Caesar?

There is the old idea that God is the male head of a divinely created and eternal Patriarchal Order that relegates every female to a secondary role in a forever of existence?

Based on a relationship with the old ideas you have already accepted could you not then by your own perception understand that the Divine with whom you commune is in fact Old Wrathful?

eternal damnation syndrome

Eternal Damnation

How about a new challenge to your honesty about belief? Could you consider that the higher power with whom you have intimate and personal communion is also the Divine Author of Compassion.  Might the ultimate way of human interaction with the Divine not be with a God of commandments, obedience and punishment?

Could you easily accept the idea that the God you have yet to really know or understand is focused entirely on our loving one another and not focused on our condemnation of anyone?

The adolescent religion of my birth was presented to me as a life based on a continuous pattern of spiritual prompting. The Mormonism that informed my culture came into being in the world of 19th-century American religious literalism. It was based on experiences that bore in their very existence widely-accepted assumptions as to the definitions and meanings of spiritual promptings – revelation, as it were.

The Father and Son described by Joseph Smith in his Vision were entirely consistent with the fundamentalist bible-based definitions of who God is. In addition, there was a naive assumption as to how that male patriarchal god communicates with man.

As I was taught, when God the Father speaks, such communication includes an investiture of authority to those “called” to speak to the rest of us on His Divine behalf.  Such became his middle men to the rest of the mortals.

It is necessary to discover, understand and acknowledge one’s own personal cosmic vision and acknowledge the assumptions upon which definitions and constructions of both reality and the spiritual world are created.

Faith is abuse

We create them all by ourselves. Others do not create them for us except to the degree that we let someone else’s constructs become our constructs.

In very powerful but subconscious ways, many believers practice their religion with an internal image that they “know” exists. This internal image that they have never actually seen exists in their perception for one principal reason. Religious authorities or friends and family whom they esteem have witnessed to them that they “know” God exists as defined in the traditional dogmatic ways of testimony and authority.

In the same fashion, many believers “know” of the reality
where the patriarchal god “is,”
where Jesus Christ “is,”
and where Satan “is” and “works” and “wants to rule.”

For many Christians, that spirit world exists in some other dimension and can only interact with our own world in supernatural ways.

When we get to the supernatural in a religious sense, honesty requires some sort of consistency to assumptions about that realm.

Satan is a god or godlike and – as is the Father – is everywhere omnipresent and forever asserting his contrary will. Satan becomes the direct opposite and yet needful counter to the goodness and righteous-requiring Commander-God. Satan is a supernatural reality who tempts mortals to both “sins” of commission and of omission.

Does it not seem that most believers then have difficulty with the psychology of evil and the idea that Satan does not have to be supernatural to function more as a conceptual part evil’s existence?

Satan represents among other things the natural mortal tendency to self-focused, self-interested acts that disregard the good of anyone else. In this regard concepts of laziness, selfishness, arrogance and intolerance, for example, represent tendencies that can easily be related to evil and its impact on actions.

Such a circumstance suggests that if not addressed with the growing maturity of critical thinking, the childish state could grasp us for a lifetime.

Murder of Hypatia Sanford L. Drob
Murder of Hypatia by a mob of Christian monks of Bishop Cyril of Alexandria

Many of us, as Dr. Marcus Borg has written, have never gotten away from our pre-critical naiveté that still forms our internal Imaginative spiritual reality.

Stuck in that 19th-Century place.

Christian fundamentalists remain even today driven by hundreds of years of theological guesswork that is more obviously flawed and inadequate. Older believers continue to be astonished that more of their own children are willing to step into an adult life absent the childish religious thinking of their parents. Many childish adults are  mortified that the happy ending anticipated for themselves and their children because of all that obedience and performance is not coming to pass.

The Old Time Religion does not work – principally because all those old assumptions that were never valid are now seriously impeding societal movement toward social justice and genuine compassionate concern for each other.

religion is crowd control

The old imperial and monarchical imaginary heaven no longer describes the spiritual reality of which more and more human beings are becoming conscious.

It’s time to stop climbing and clamoring all over that medieval statue of Jesus and instead look in the direction in which Jesus was always pointing … the compassionate god whose kingdom has always thrived and pulsed within ourselves … as he said.

Most importantly, it is long past time for us to grow-up. It is time that adults reject the childish idea of patriarchy, a morally corrupt fraud that seriously harms every society in which it festers.

It’s time to step out of the shallow end of the religion pool.

shallow end of the pool parkways seattle gov

On men behaving badly …

mom is mad

Yew boys need to get off the field and let us other folks find your substitutes who will play the better game.

“The message is clear. Everyone had better run for cover because Daddy’s on the warpath and somebody’s going to get hurt.

The problem with this tactic is that everything is already so crazy and chaotic that these kinds of threats no longer inspire the terror they’re meant to. Perhaps this thrills their followers, but it doesn’t scare women or people of color anymore. In fact, it’s motivating them to remove these out-of-control people from power.

They aren’t daddies at all. They are spoiled children having a temper tantrum. And they need a very long time-out.”

Bruce MacKinnon: The assault of Lady Justice.

Halifax artist's cartoon in response to Kavanaugh hearing grips internet

Halifax artist’s cartoon in response to Kavanaugh hearing grips internet

MacKinnon said he was compelled to draw the cartoon, which was published in the weekend edition of The Chronicle Herald, to illustrate what he believes to be a crucial example of how allegations of sexual abuse are treated in North America.

“In a year that was so dominated by the #MeToo movement and the changes that I think we all hope will come from that, this seems to be an almost watershed moment and a very pivotal one for America,” he said. 

The image has gone viral since Saturday, amassing tens of thousands of likes and thousands of shares on social media websites like Reddit, Twitter and Facebook.

It caught the attention of actress and #MeToo activist Alyssa Milano, who tweeted it out Sunday with the caption: “You’ve made a misogynistic, hurtful, joke of our Supreme Court, @realDonaldTrump. … Women won’t forget. And we vote.”

Some users have described feeling a “gut punch” upon seeing it, and one woman tweeted the provocative cartoon made her feel like she couldn’t breathe.

But MacKinnon said these feelings of disgust are, in some ways, the point of his cartoon.


Real male spiritual integrity

Required viewing. Real male spiritual integrity as the son of one of the original fundamentalist theologians who in the 1980’s summoned evangelicals into political action, Frank Schaffer refuses to remain silent.

Did You Ever Think You’d See the Day When American Evangelicals Would Be Identified with the Approval of a Rapist?

Franklin Graham’s Trump Cult hypocrisies have now totally displaced his last vestige of Christian faith. The Rev. Franklin Graham, says the attempted rape of Dr. Ford was not a crime because “if it was true, these are two teenagers, and she said no and he respected that.”

When Republicans elected Trump who boasted of being a sexual predator, and was credibly accused by more than a dozen women of molestation they antagonized women and decent men. Now as the GOP defends an accused rapist they’ve become all women’s and all good men’s sworn enemy.

This turn of events wasn’t inevitable. Trump had other, credible, conservative nominees for the Supreme Court. As usual Trump made a mess because of his gut instinct for ego-based failure in the real world when forced out of his imaginary inflated pretend reality.

As far as I am concerned, the breadth of Schaeffer’s criticism includes more than the Protestant fundamentalism that spawned the likes of
Franklin Graham,
Falwell’s Moral Majority,
Pat Robertson,
James Dobson,
Paul Weyrich,
Randall Terry and a blind rage against abortion that spawned religious assassins and preening self-righteous bigots.

Right Wing Evangelicals – despite their protests – have vowed to impose one single dominant morality on the country. These folks however are not limited to your standard Protestant fundamentalists. Needing inclusion is the potent spiritual force that seems hell-bent on needlessly joining the Evangelical In-Crowd in an entirely tone-deaf manner that seems oblivious to which way the wind is blowing.

There are four Mormons on that Judiciary committee. Only Jeff Flake seems to be practicing his religious convictions by separating political beliefs and religious beliefs in order to reach for the highest good of all concerned. The other three, Senators Hatch, Lee and Crapo, demonstrate what happens when such separations are not made. They become panderers to partisan politics and its supporters and – for me – a moral embarrassment of the culture from which they stepped forth into the public political arena.

This on the toady who wants to be in Trump’s cabinet.

Flashback: Remember When Lindsey Graham Cared About ‘Judicial Temperament’?

As Lietta reminded me when I completed this post, Kavvie said it. What goes around comes around.

A quite cowardly Baby-Boomer one of those who commands the attention of a nation. Lindsey Graham on my mind … A shame to my generation … actively performing for Trump and in hope of a cabinet position … as usual it goes to hypocrisy. His “man-child” favorite Judge Kavanaugh lost his temper, ranted and whined like a child in fear of losing his lollipop.

Consider the following excerpt…

“If Sonia Sotomayor had put on the type of disgusting, aggressive, nasty, combative display we saw from Brett Kavanaugh this week, Republicans would have been ready to haul her off in a straight jacket. For that matter, if she’d acted like Lindsey Graham when he threw his temper tantrum during the hearing, they would have said she was unfit to sit on the Supreme Court.

Here’s a little flashback for anyone who would like to remind Graham what a huge flaming hypocrite he is when it comes to what he believes passes for fitness to serve on the highest court in our land.”