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On Republican political dog-and-pony bait-and-switch-stampeders.
When we lived on the Washington Coast our next door neighbor had a little but loud dog, Tito. Tito was a ferocious loud yapper who took it upon himself to defend the neighborhood against all invaders. That pesky neighborhood-disturbing yapper caught my attention one day when he found what looked like popcorn out on the road in front of the neighbor’s house. Ten to fifteen crows were after the free grub.
Tito thought not.
I watched as the crows first positioned themselves on telephone lines and trees in a kind of tactical circle. Tito would be busy trying to keep them all away from the popcorn. When a few of the crows landed at one end of the food, Tito went after them. On the opposite side, other crows swooped down and began feasting. Tito of course turned and roared after the offenders, leaving his previous quarry free to move in. It took less than 10 minutes for the popcorn to disappear.
The scene caused me thoughts about how the defensive tactic of airborne bombers and submarines illustrates the value of diversion as a means of avoiding destruction. When the pilot or sub commander orders the release of chaff after an enemy air-to-air missile or torpedo is launched, the need becomes the disruption of the “electronic” attention span of the missile or torpedo.
Well, nowadays the stampeders are trying to use political chaff on us.
It seems that we who try to make sense of politics our Republican frenemies relentlessly trot on stage have a tough job using our own critical thinking. We are tempted to chase the chaff and bark at the distractions while the real vultures stay their course and remain ready to swoop dow to bite off more and greater chunks of reality.
In this regard, I suppose many would say that the Silly Party manipulators do their job well. I’m not ready to ascribe to the stampeders some idea of superior genius that most of us lack, but I do acknowledge their willingness – the outlandish gall – to go ahead and try whatever works; whatever can be gotten away with.
Well, back to Tito. A week or so later I was cleaning out our freezer and found two loaves of special bread we had purchased a couple of years ago on a trip. I noticed a few spots of mold and concluded that old frozen bread would not do for our menu. I was about to toss them in the trach when I remembered Tito.
Oh, more entertainment! I tossed both loaves out on to the road between our house and the neighbors and watched.
Tito did not appear. Our dog, Jake, (who was part Australian Shepherd and Collie and looked like Lassie with a blunt nose) wandered out into the road and sniffed at one of the loaves. Wasn’t his cup of tea so he started to ignore it. At that point another neighbor from up the street walked by with his own dog who sniffed at the other loaf, took it in his mouth, carried it about 30 yards up the road before dropping it and moving on.
By this time the crows had gathered and Jake – like Tito two weeks earlier – found himself invested in keeping the crows from stealing the bread. He stared at the other loaf some 30 yards off as several crows landed and started biting out chunks.
Jake rushed toward the action and the crows took flight. Standing over the far loaf he looked back to see the crows landing around the other loaf still on the road on front of our house.
Now Jake was not Tito; not excitable. Jake had a herding and guarding instinct that astounded me at times. He looked at those crows for a moment, took the distant loaf in his mouth, trotted over close to the first loaf. The crows flew off. He then proceeded to bury the loaf he’d carried back to our house, digging a hole less than 15 feet from the first loaf. The crows watched Jake bury that loaf. They knew he was not to be distracted.
When he was through, Jake trotted over and “stayed the course” with the remaining loaf – keeping the crows from thievery. I don’t know how long Jake sustained his vigil but I realized that his own tactic of setting aside one distraction for another more appropriate time was a valuable life’s lesson.
Think about that the next time you listen to someone who needs you to behave as if you were an angry white man under the spell of Fox News. Evoking sufficient interest requires topics worthy of attention. There are important things upon which our perceptions ought to remain focused but we decide. We don’t let some blabber mouth dictate what those things are.
The Silly Party manipulators are not geniuses. Their strongest attribute is cunning and a willingness to try anything that might work. If the applause are not great then they will cut their losses and think up something else.
Working to think one or two steps ahead of stampeders is hard but not impossible. The benefits are enormous – the ability to ignore the nonsense while closing in on the real thing.
Chaff is what we are seeing, hearing and reading from the Republican party. Chaff is supposed to distract us. Chaff is supposed to make all of us angry and ignorant human beings. Chaff is the path manipulators will take to trot out smoke and mirrors to fool us once, twice and always.
The Saga of Crooked Donald 